Forgotten Roads
by doublemeaning94
Summary: Jude is just a hunter. For years she has been trained to hunt demons, ghosts, vampires and everything else that the world needs to be safe from. But when her Uncle Castiel tells her that it is time to tell Dean Winchester he has a daughter she isn't sure it's the right idea. Will he accept the fact that she has chosen the hunting life or try to push her out? Supernatural OC Fic
1. Motel 6

**Alright First Supernatural Fan Fic. I write about other shows on a different account but didn't want to put this one on there **

**Okay there are a lot of Dean Winchester daughter stories but I still think this will be fun and how cool would this be?**

**Anyway this is set in 2018 after all of the shows (most) of them have been solved and now this is pure making up of the storyline. Dean is about thirty nine at this point, making Sam thirty five.**

**This chapter will be super short as it is just the intro.**

"What is so important Cas?" You hear an angry voice ask over the cell phone and cringe sitting on the couch of a Motel 6. You cross and uncross your legs clad in tight fitting dark wash jeans that have been worn well and staring at her black canvas on black rubber shoes with black laces. You have three pairs: One for dirty jobs, one for regular jobs and one for dressing up. This is your dressing up pair. You felt as if you should care a little what you look like at the moment. You chose a maroon ribbed tank top with your dark blue synch waist navy jacket over it. You ware this jacket all the time it was really just the shoes that made any difference. You are liable to start picking at the American flag patch on the left sleeve if you get any more nervous.

"Just pull up to the motel on your left Dean." Cass says in his exasperated tone which sounds like all the rest of his tones. He may to work on his tones. "Dean you ask stupid questions when you know I am an angel. I know where you are." He clicks the phone shut. You have been with Cas when he has been talking with him before but now it's different because he is coming here.

"I feel you are nervous from over here." He says in his exasperated tone. Or is that his soothing tone? You know it is his soothing tone but the thought makes you chuckle none the less and Cass quirks an eyebrow at you. You take a deep breath and stare at him for a minute.

"What if he doesn't like me?" You ask feeling a little ashamed for sounding like a teenage girl as this comes out. You are eighteen after all but teenage doesn't really apply when you have been fighting off demons and all the rest of hell since you were twelve. Six years ago is when Castiel saved you.

"He doesn't like anyone." He said matter-of-factly. You shake your head at his literalness.

"What is he expecting?" You ask him

"He is expecting me alone in this hotel room." He said pacing in front of the door.

"What are you going to tell him?" you ask again. You stand up now and walk over to him. "Cass what if he doesn't believe you. What if he rejects me? What if he doesn't want to have anything to do with me?"

"Then you will go back to being a hunter and continue on your ways. But he must know. Bobby convinced me at first not to tell him and then you but it is time that he knew." Cass said taking your shoulders in his hands and giving you a solid shake to reassure you of his plan. It doesn't work.

You go back to the couch and sit down taking a deep breath. You have to remind yourself that this isn't the end of the world. That Dean and Sam Winchester will not be the thing that kills you. You have faced much worse things than family confrontation before and this isn't about to make you turn tail and run. You have almost got yourself calmed down when there is a knock at the door that makes you jump a little inside as you sit straighter on the couch.

They both come in. You have seen them before of course. From a distance you have watched them Cas, bobby or another sympathetic hunter by your side. But up close as they walk into the room together is nothing like before. They move as a pair. They are completely comfortable and confident with what the other will do even if it is as simple as walking into a room.

"What is this Cas, We are tracking down a vamp we don't have time…." Dean trails off looking in your direction. Sam looks over too and tilts his head.

"Who is that?" Sam asks

"You gotta girl here?" Dean asks with a little pride but you wrinkle your nose at that prospect and Cas just looks at him.

"It is a girl." Cas says to him

"Well who is it Cas." He asks loudly and you can't stand it anymore so you get up and walk over to him holding your right hand for him to shake. The four suits of card symbols tattooed on the outside of your fingers. You look into his eyes which are your own; that shimmering light green with just a hint of trouble to them. Also you realize that you have the light smattering of freckles that he does across his face. You are proud of that for some reason you cannot explain. You twist your dark brown hair over one shoulder and hold out your hand again. He looks at you but doesn't take your hand so you start in on what you have been planning to tell him forever.

"My name is Jude Ira Masonwic and I am your daughter Dean Winchester."


	2. Being Civil

**I do not own Supernatural or any of the characters except for my OC**

You are tied to a chair now.

Dean had seemed okay with the news that you had given him and everything seemed like it would be okay. He told Castiel to go get you all some cheeseburgers while he got to know Jude. You should have seen something coming. As soon as Cas had gone He wrestled you into a wooden chair and your hands were tied behind your back that they pulled seemingly out of nowhere. Now you were staring directly into your own eyes only they were your father's eyes with and your hands are tied tightly behind you.

"Who are you?" He asked you angrily "Hoe have you gotten Cas to believe you?"

"I already told you who I am" You sigh

"You're lying." He said getting up and walking away from you. You have cut through about half of the rope by this time hoping he hasn't noticed.

"Why would I lie?" You ask sincerely. "I have no reason to lie to you."

"So I just suddenly have a daughter that is twenty years old?" He accused you and you roll your eyes.

"Dean she kinda looked like you just then." Sam chuckles in the back ground.

"Shut up Sammy." Dean growls at him and you tilt your head sideways.

"I'm eighteen not twenty." You say getting the ropes loose but holding them until the opportunity arises that you won't look like a criminal for getting yourself free. "I was born in 2000"

"I was twenty one." He said dryly

"Actually my birthday is on March eighteenth so you were twenty when I was conceived." You smile back at him "Doing a little run amuck for a while there huh?"

"No he still does that." Sam says matter of factly and you smile at him and he smiles back at you.

"Don't joke with it Sam." Dean snaps

"It?" You ask slightly offended "I am Human Dean Winchester whether you accept me or not and you have no right to tie me up here. I didn't ask for your acceptance. I didn't even vote to tell you. That was all Cas." You pause and look directly into his face "Uncle Bobby wanted didn't want you to know either."

"Don't you talk about him!" Dean shouts at you.

"He was my family too Dean!" You shout back to him. "When Ronan shot him in the head I was devastated." You say this with force but don't yell. "I don't have much family. Just Cas and Bobby and Steve the hunter I am with most the time. It killed me when I lost him; I was only eleven."

"Who was your mother?" Dean asked quieter now.

"Her Name was Harriet Wasonwic." You say quiet. You don't remember much of your mother. Other than she was beautiful and loved to talk. "Bartender by trade."

"Harriet..." He says trying to remember.

"Don't bother." You say flippantly. "I know how you are and especially how you were don't expect you to remember a busty blond bartender you slept with one and the one condom that didn't work." When you look up Dean takes a lid off of a flask and you wonder if you have drove him to drink but them he empties the contents on you and holy water drips over your face. You open your mouth to speak but he takes his hand out of another pocket and opens your mouth and pours salt in it. You cough roughly and spit out all the salt on the floor as your mouth puckers up.

"Oh for Christ sakes!" You shout when the door opens and Cas comes through with two bags of food and a drink carrier with four beverages.

"Dean what are you doing?" He asks. You bolt out of the chair dropping the rope on the ground and grasping at a cup desperately taking the lid off and drinking it quickly. It turns out to be coke and it burns your throat a little. Dean steps toward you but you grab a knife from Castiel's waistband quickly and point it at him Dean as you finish off the coke. You set it back in the cup holder and return Cas's knife to his pocket.

"Thanks' Uncle Cas." You say reaching into a bag and pull out a burger and a thing of onion rings. You stick one in your mouth and walk toward the couch deliberate in kicking the chair aside on your way. "Now shall we talk like civilized people or are you going to tie me up again?"

"She reminds me of you more and more." Sam says grabbing food out of Castiel's bag and he comes over and sits right next to you on the couch. He holds his hand out and you shake it. "Sam Winchester."

"I know." You say taking a bite of your burger.

"I guess I'm your uncle right?" He asks and you nod chewing slowly as he looks at you. Hearing stories about them Sam has always been the softer one. Except he had a time when he was drinking demon blood. Then that time when he was soulless. However overall Sam was more compassionate than Dean was. Or rather he couldn't hide it as well as Dean could.

"Now wait a minute Sam." Dean said taking food also. "We haven't decided what she is let alone my daughter."

"Dean." Sam said with a lot of patience like he had done this many times. "Look at her."

You look up at Dean and he is looking at you and that 'I'm a hard ass' face softened for a moment.

"Dean I wouldn't lie to you." Cas said from the door where he stood.

"I know you wouldn't Cas but come on." Dean said turning to him.

"Dean I saved her when she was six years old." Cas said.

"You didn't even know me then." Dean shook his head not believing.

"Gabriel found her." Castiel shook his head.

"That doesn't make sense." Dean says

"We went back in time to get her. To keep her safe from the things that killed her mother." Castiel said grabbing his shoulder. Dean's eyes were downcast. "The timeline changed. History changed but not enough to damage anything."

"How did her mom die?" Dean asks.

"A car accident that turned out to be not so accident." You say holding your hand out for a sip of Castiel's coke. He gives you a look and you give him the best puppy face you can muster. He hands you the coke and you smile widely. "Demons killed her looking for me."

"Why were they looking for you?" Sam asks. You look at Castiel who nods at you and you swallow hard.

"Because I'm his kid." You say pointing to Dean "All my life I have been chased after to use as a bargaining chip. Gotten taken; Went to hell a couple times." You stop seeing the look of horror on Dean's face. "It's okay Crowley always found me." You reassure him

"You know Crowley!?" Dean shouts like he can't believe any of this.

"Crowley banned people from kidnapping me. They still tried...but hey, he always watched out for me." You say.

"Crowley?" Sam asked incredulously.

"I told you the past was changed." Cas said. "Crowley helped me get in all of our minds who knew about her except for Steve. When we saw her or hear her full name we remembered her who she was and where she was but ten minutes of not seeing her or hearing her name we would forget we ever knew her or anything we had done for her. We forgot everything. It was the only way to keep history almost the same. It was the only way to protect you all."

"Why?" Dean asked now sitting on the chair he had tied Jude up to.

"To keep her safe." Cas said "It was my number one priority even before the both of you. I knew you would want me to keep her safe. Seven years ago we took the lock off of everyone so we all knew all the time and just didn't tell you." Dean looked at him. You could tell that he was on the edge. Like he wanted to believe.

"Hold on." You say going to your bag by the front door and pulling out a large change purse that holds what is most important to you. You pull out some photos and walk over to Dean.

"This is Bobby and I on my tenth birthday. He bought me my very own shotgun." You smile at the picture though looking at it makes you sad a little. "This is Cass and I at my volleyball tournament at one of the many schools I attended. He came to a lot of my volleyball tournaments."

"When you were too busy to come save our asses you were watching teenager's volleyball game?" Dean asked Cas who just shrugged.

"You're alive aren't you?" Cas asked him and you laugh

"This is the first time I saw you. Cas took me to a diner you guys were eating at and I took a picture of you." You say looking at the photo of them sitting three tables over Dean taking a bite of pie. This was your favorite picture. You remember how Cas let you sit there the whole time watching them. You even remember when Dean looked up at you and raised his eyebrows and smiled. It had been a good day. You watch as Dean stares at the picture. He flips to the next one.

"Your mom?" He asks and you nod. Looking at it with him. She was blond and curvy just what every man who comes into a bar wants to see. You were built a lot like her with her round face but your eyes were green not brown and your skin was smattered with freckles. And your hair was nowhere near blond.

"I can see why I liked her." He grunts out and you wonder if that is an apology or not. You wait for anything. Just any sort of hint that he will make. At this point you don't care if he likes you or not you just want to get it over with.

"So I guess you're a Winchester then." He says as your heart stops.

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	3. Vampire Den

**I do not own Supernatural**

I was eleven the last time I saw Bobby.

I was lying in my bed reading a diary of a hunter. I had found out weeks before that bobby died. No warning and about a week before I was supposed to stay with him for a week. I was devastated. I was more upset than hunters were supposed to be about his death. There isn't an actual rulebook that we followed but don't cry about other dead hunters was definitely a rule. I did cry for Bobby. A lot.

Steve the hunter that I mainly lived with pretty much left me alone. I had collected myself over the two weeks and I was getting back into hunting. A little colder perhaps and a little more distant but that was to be expected. I was reading a journal about the order of hell when he appeared. At first I didn't notice him standing there like a real human. When I reached over to turn the light off I saw him. My hand outstretched toward the lamp and my eyes wide and he was just standing there looking at me. Not smiling, just looking.

"Hey kiddo" He said to me and I reached under my bed pulling out an iron rod I got up as fast as I could and ran swinging the rod through the image of him and dissipating his form. I spun around panting looking for him again before I realized that I just dissipated the ghost of the only blood relative I had. I dropped the iron rod and yelled out.

"Bobby!" He didn't answer me "Bobby I'm sorry!" I called out to the nothing

"Gotta good arm on you kid." He said to me from behind me and I turned around to face him

"Bobby what are you doing here? How are you here?" I asked walking back and sitting on my bed.

"Got something tying me here hon. Thought I would drop in to say hello guess I missed our last bonding time." He said.

"I miss you bobby." I said tearing up a little.

"Now don't go all sissy on me Jude." He said and tried to let the tears dissipate before they dropped.

"Where are you?" I asked tucking my knees under my arms.

"Floating around making sure that the boys are okay" He said to me and anger flamed up inside me. Of course he would be talking about them when he was visiting me.

"Yeah?" I asked in a clipped tone.

"You know they always get in trouble Jude." He explained. I knew that and I knew that I shouldn't be mad. I knew Sam and dean had every demon on their back and that they could use all the help they could get but I just wanted bobby to be here for me right now.

"I'm sorry I won't be there for you." He said and I reached for the pearl anti possession pendant he gave me a year ago. It was on a silver thin chain and Cas silver charm for hiding me from Demons and Angels. It was the only piece of jewelry I wore aside from the two studs in each of my ears.

"It's fine" I said waving him off. "It's the life right. That's what you always told me."

"Yeah I did." He said. They talked for a long while about things that they had done and he told me about the boys. I didn't really mind so much actually. Because in my own way I loved the boys and I wanted them to be safe and I wanted Bobby to help them. And after a long time it was time for him to say goodbye.

"You gotta leave now don't you Uncle Bobby?" I asked in my small childlike voice.

"I do kiddo." He said to me and I tried to 'be a man' as Steve said

"Are you coming back?" I asked him

"No hon I'm gonna go for good this time. You won't see me again until the other side. I'll be waiting for ya." He explained

"Who's gonna teach me how to be a hunter now Uncle Bobby?" I asked taking a deep breath in. He just smiled at me. "I love ya kid." He said before he disappeared. But it wasn't the last thing he said to me.

The last thing he said to me is why I was where I was; standing outside an abandon building. It was an abandon warehouse if I was being accurate. I followed Dean and Sam to the Vampire Nest they had found d and it was a really good thing too because they had gotten taken captive. There was nothing that hostile vampires liked more than hunters to torture. The boys had walked right into this without thinking anything through which was what they always did. Since I was little the stories I heard about them sometimes I questioned the stupidity of their actions. It seemed they put themselves directly in harm's way. The worse thing was that they put other people in harm's way.

I parked my forest green, eighty five, Land Cruiser outside. I had already scoped it out and found the best way to get into the building with the least security. Not that there would be none but they vampires were pretty preoccupied. They wouldn't be expecting anyone else. See the big bad things about these vampires were that they were working with Demons. Those demons had tipped them off to Dean and Sam coming and they had been waiting for them. I knew this from the bug that I had placed on Dean's coat when he left the hotel. Cas had told them he had a bad feeling about this one. And while the boys may not listen to Cas's intuition I did. I was glad she had too. If she hadn't then it was unlikely that Dean would be alive to come back to the hotel to 'deal' with me like he promised he would.

I went to the back of the car and opened up the back. I pulled out the false bottom and looked over all of my hunting tools. The collections weren't as detailed as some but I was working on it. I strapped the mostly always present twin Beretta 92FS' in my black shoulder holster. They were a gift from Steven with my initials in silver on the bottom. It was funny that hunters have each other weapons even a sixteen year old girl for her birthday.

The only way to kill a vampire was decapitation and these would decapitate them but they would slow them down and I never went into a job without them. I picked up the small electric powered sawzall that I had found came in handy with hostile vampires. Yes it seemed a little excessive and movie fantastical but the truth was no matter how many times I went to the gym a day or how many hunts I went on I couldn't slice through the human spine by sheer strength. I was a woman and I needed a little help and my small sawzall was just the trick. I didn't care if male hunters sniveled at me behind my back. They wouldn't laugh when I saved their asses.

I closed the hide and closed the back of the car and walked up to the front of my car. I set my saw on the hood and tucked my charm necklace in my shirt. It was the one bobby had given me with Cas', Crowley and Bobby's charm on it. I had gotten the anti-possession rune tattooed just beneath my collarbone when I turned sixteen and made the full-fledged choice to be a hunter and Cas had burned hiding runes onto my ribs I still carried the charms with me; always. I reached into my consul and pulled out my phone and my wireless ear bud headphones. I synced them up and put them in starting my work playlist. I placed the phone in the breast pocket of my jacket. Tesla started playing drowning out the sounds of the night.

Classic rock hadn't been something I had always listened to. When I was twelve I went through a phase where I wanted to be as much like Dean Winchester as possible. I had Cas tell me everything he knew about him and did everything he did. I listened to the music he did I said the things he did. I learned how to fix cars like he did. While I had gotten over that phase I had latched onto the classic rock movement. It was hardly the only thing I listened to but it was mostly when I was working. I bobbed my head to the music picking up the saw and locking my car throwing my keys in another zippered pocket.

I walked into the warehouse watching my back and making my way through the hall that was littered with dead bodies. It made me want to vomit; though this wasn't uncommon for messy horrible creatures like this. They would fill the place up with dead people and then move on to somewhere else and do the same thing, leaving hunters to clean up the mess so that the public didn't find it. I ran into my first security man who didn't know I was there. He was watching tv on his smartphone. Typical. The saw was somewhat silent but the scream he made as his head was leaving his shoulders wasn't so I had to move faster now. I quickly ran down the halls and ran into a woman vampire.

"Damon?" She asked looking at me confused

"No. He's dead." I said and she bared her fangs at me. I pulled the Beretta from the holster and fired three shot into her head. I holstered the gun as she was coming to her senses rather quickly and I pinned her head to the wall with the saw very close to her face. The saw vibrating splattering leftover blood on both their faces.

"Where are they?" I asked her and she looked down the hall and then quickly back at me. "Thank you." I said and tore into her leaving her like I had the last one. I stopped the saw and crept along the halls. I stopped pulling my phone and changing the feed from music to the bug I had placed on Dean.

"Well you boys look comfortable." I heard through the heavy breathing of Dean.

"Friken mouth breather." I said under my breath hurrying down the hall again. There were no more vampires which put me on edge. Usually they traveled in packs of about ten. I had only killed two. That meant that there was a ton in the room with the boys. I walked along until I came to one of the doors that went into the room I wanted to be in. I took my ear buds out and stuck them in my pocket. I knew which side of the room they were on by the sound of the talking. It was opposite if not far away so I opened the door as silently as I could.

I slipped in. I couldn't see anyone at all. I could only hear them. There were pallets of unrecognizable goods scattered throughout the room. I went from one to the other getting closer to the voices. As I leaned out from a pallet I saw something I didn't quite understand.

The boys were tied up in chains which wasn't unusual but there was two vampires lying dead and decapitated on the floor to her right. She looked back to the woman who was talking to the boys. I looked back at the boys and I suppose I wasn't being as quiet as I hoped I was because Sam's eyes snapped up to mine. I gave him a head nod before disappearing behind the pallet as I listened to the conversation.

"why would you kill them if they were trying to help you?" Sam asked the woman who's back was to me.

"I told you Little Sammy Demon's don't partner up with monsters we just use them." She said softly and I nodded she was a demon. So I started reciting the word I had learned before I knew the state capitols.

"Exorcizamus te, omnis immundus spiritus, omnis satanica …" I was stopped short by sound of her laugh.

"That won't work on me little girl why don't you come out." She chuckled again and I rolled my eyes. I came out from behind the pallet.

"Well who do we have here?" The pretty blond possessed woman asked cocking her head as I came out walking confidently toward her and the boys who were looking at me like I was the stupidest person they had ever seen. I knew I was pretty stupid but I hardly think I deserved that look.

"What are you doing here?" Dean halfway yelled at me. But instead of answering either of them I pulled a small knife from my pocket.

"You are going to die child." The demon said and I put the saw on the ground taking the gun from my left side that's pullets were pure salt. I shot a round into her heart and continued calmly on cutting my thumb open and pulling out the third charm from my necklace and pressed my thumb to it. The woman was mad now. The salt had really done nothing to her but throw her off guard. She came at me but before she reached me I smiled at her.

"I summon the Demon Crowley. King of Hell." And with that she stopped in her tracks. She stared at me blankly and then she was no longer staring at me but she was staring behind me.

"Jude I know you add that king of hell thing for my benefit and I give props to those who raised you." I turned and smiled at the man I referred to as Uncle King, upon his insistence when I was younger. I referred to a lot of people as uncle that I had no relation to.

"Hey." I said nodding to the demon behind me now but when I turned the demon was exiting the human body as the black smoke shot up in the air. I smiled and turned back to Crowley putting away my knife and gun and walked over and embraced him. He wasn't a fan of hugs but he indulged me anyway. One of his arms patted me on the back awkwardly.

"well well well what have we here…" He said turning to look at the boys who were now looking at me like I was an alien. They needed to watch their looks. It was ill mannered "Little Deany boy find out about his cherub of a daughter finally." I rolled my eyes at him and walked toward them. "but why help them Jude?" Crowley asked knowing the answer already.

Because those were actually bobby's last words to me. The thing that made me search for the boys over and over to make sure that they were okay. Because he made me swear as his form was slipping away and I would have done anything for him.

"I promised Bobby I would look after them."

**Read and Review! Hope you like it!**


	4. Get to Know the Family

**I do not own Supernatural **

"Cas!" I shouted outside the Steve's house in anger. I had been calling him all afternoon and he wasn't coming.

"I wouldn't take it personally." Dean said shaking his head. "Sometimes he doesn't come." I turned and scowled at him.

"No sometimes he doesn't come when you call him. He always comes when I call him." I turned around and looked up at the sky. Though I knew that Cass wasn't up there. It was some childhood fantasy humans had about heaven being up in the sky. "Cas! Get your ass down here this is not the time to play games!"

"Seems like he isn't coming so you may as well get in the car." Dean said again as my back was to him. I resisted the urge to flip him off.

"Cas, I know you can hear me. I don't want to spend time with them Cas. Don't force me to." This was more of a whisper as I prayed to Cas. I knew he could hear me even if he was choosing not to come. "Cas you promised you would always come." I said and I could practically feel the guilt radiating off of him from wherever he was. Then I felt a little bad because that is exactly what I had meant to do. I wanted to apologize but also didn't at the same time. So instead I turned around and walked to the black impala and climbed in the back seat.

"See that wasn't so hard." Dean said as he got in the driver seat.

"Dean I would wait to patronize her for a little while she is your kid after all." Sam said and dean looked at my in the rearview mirror and I raised an eyebrow at him.

"I think you may be right." Dean said. I slid my bag over in the seat next to me with clothes and my guns in it. I wasn't going to pout because that was what children did. I had to accept the fact that everyone except me thought that spending time with Sam and dean was a good idea. Steve hadn't been there to stick up for me and Cas was AWOL which meant he agreed with Sam and Dean. I wanted to hunt alone like I had been doing for two years now. I was good at it. I liked being alone but there was nothing I could do about this now. There was no one else to call. I supposed I could call Crowley but he only helped me if I was being kidnapped and dragged to hell or to be tortured by some demon. I tried to think of a way to make this a situation where he would come help me but decided against it in the end.

"So…" Dean said driving and still looking at me in the mirror. I didn't break eye contact with him.

"So." I replied in a sassy tone. Dean looked over at Sam who was holding back laughter.

"Do you go…to school?" Dean asked and it sounded so painful that I began to laugh. Sam joined me and now Dean was scowling.

"I'm sorry." I said getting the last chuckle out of my system. "I graduated high school when I was fifteen, got my GED. I went to college for a few years…" I said nonchalantly "Went while I hunted while I hunted. "Actually I just got my teaching credentials which is what I was going for."

"How did you go to school and hunt?" Sam asked me he looked genuinely interested.

"I did everything online mostly except for the classes you can't." I said turning my head to look at him. "Oh that's right you were almost a lawyer huh?" I asked and he nodded.

"If you are going to be a hunter why would you need a teaching degree?" Dean asked irritated. Though I think maybe he always sounded irritated.

"In case I decide to skip out on hunting." I shrugged. "I'm good with kids."

"You would just leave your family?" Dean asked and Sam frowned and turned back to look out the front window. There was still tension about Sam leaving for college. Bobby had told me that John (who I had only met once) and Dean had taken it really hard.

"I didn't have a family Dean." I stated flatly.

"Hunting family is family." He stated. "Related or not." He wanted to argue with me and I didn't have enough self-control to let it go.

"The only person who knew I existed one hundred percent of the time was Steve who was gone seventy percent of the time and when he was around All I was a burden that he had been picked to take care of as a favor to Bobby. No one even remembered that I was Alive Dean. I didn't exist. I didn't have a Sam to hunt with. I didn't have a dad to pass me down a car and everything he knew about hunting. It was just me and Occasionally Bobby and Steve with Castiel in there when he decided to come." He was silent as I sighed. I wasn't mad but our lives weren't the same. The only thing we had in common was that our mother died. "I was alone most of the time and had to figure out everything by myself. I had to one to take care of me and no one to take care of."

They were silent for awhile. There was nothing to say really. All of their childhoods had sucked. And while Jude wasn't upset about the way she was raised she couldn't say she hadn't imagined a normal life. A life where Dean married her mother and had a few other kids and maybe they all sat around the table for Christmas and remembered the past Christmas where Jude had spilled Egg Nog all over the carpet.

"I'm sorry you had to grow up that way." Dean said "It's why I never had kids." He paused "On purpose."

"I don't want you to be sorry for me." Jude said. "I know they did the best they could and it wasn't anyone's fault. Just don't judge me for making myself an option where I can get out of this life that made me an orphan." Silence again on his end and Jude closed her eyes and leaned her head back against the seat.

"How is your love life?" Dean asked about five minutes later and Jude's eyes shot open and she sat up straight. Sam's head was turned to Dean and his eyes were wide.

"Mine?" Sam asked and Dean scowled at him.

"My what?" I asked form the backseat. Dean looked at me in the rearview mirror. His face was a little red but he looked like he was serious like he was trying really hard to be nice to her. She was going to laugh at him but she couldn't bring herself to after looking at his face.

"Never…" He started and Sam was still looking at him

"Did you look up what dad's ask their daughters on the internet or something?" Sam asked and he was the one holding back laughter now.

"Listen, I don't know how to do this." Dean said to Sam forgetting that I was there. "I don't know what kind of questions to ask her Sammy, I don't even know how to be a dad." His tone was stressed.

"You want to stop by and get a parenting book?" Sam asked still making fun of him. Dean just scowled again. Sam chuckled and the car went back into silence.

I thought about Ernest Kimmerling; which was really the only relationship I ever had had ended about six months ago. We decided after dating both short distance and long distance while hunting that we would be friends. We agreed that the hunting life was no setting to have a relationship in but I think I fell in love with him. He was twenty years old and his birthday was a week after mine. He had text me happy birthday and I had ignored him. He had just texted me three days ago asking me how I was to which I hadn't responded yet. It turns out I was a really bad friend. Mostly it was because I had to remind myself not to hold onto people so hard just because I had so little close relationships in my life. Ernest could die tomorrow and I would just have to keep living my life and try to forget the year that I thought we would make it. So aside from when Cas let me know that he was doing okay I didn't see him at all. I hadn't seen him in nine months though he frequented my dreams.

"My love life is pretty much nonexistent." I said "As it goes when you are on the road chasing monsters." I pulled out my phone and slid to the message that Ernest sent me.

**Pretty good. How about you?**

I sent the text and waited for a response. The boys were silent again and I wasn't sure how to fill the silence with them. With Cass I could really talk about anything and with Bobby we talked about hunting and sometimes we talked about his wife and the boys sometimes if he wanted to vent.

"How are your guy's love lives?" I asked trying to dispel any tension in the air.

"Now that is a long story." Sam said "there is a lot of stories that are encompassed in that question."

"Between Dean's severe one night stand syndrome and Lisa and Your Fling with the Demon Unlce Sam and then that girl that died when you went to college you guys have pretty much hit it all huh?" I asked and they both tensed up though I didn't mean to make them upset.

"Do you know everything about us?" Dean asked.

"Pretty much." I said nodding. "Between Cas and Bobby and The Supernatural books….."

"You read those?" Dean asked

"I have read them all yes, both publically published and not. While chuck is not the most gifted writer that I have ever read it was an easy way to keep tabs on you two." I shrugged

**I'm fine. I didn't expect you to get back to me honestly. **

**What are you up to? **

"I can't believe that anyone would read those." Dean said and he sounded a little more than disgusted and Sam just looked embarrassed.

"Like I said they weren't the best books ever but Bobby and Cas were always talking about you and I wanted to be able to keep up with their conversations." I said

"So you know everything about us and we know nothing about you." Sam asked turning around.

"Essentially." I said staring at my phone unsure of what to say next. Ernest was the only one who really knew anything about me and it was hard to divulge pieces of my life to him. I had been taught to be so secretive.

"You want to tell us a little about yourself?" Dean asked from the front seat.

"What do you want to know?" I asked looking up and his forehead wrinkled at that question.

**Happy Birthday BTW. Sorry. **

**I am with Sam and Dean. **

I set the phone in my lap.

"I like hunting. I carry my guns into any hunt with me no matter what I am fighting. I miss Bobby very much. I like literature and writing. My favorite color is cobalt blue. My favorite cereal is Captain Crunch without crunch berries and I like amusement parks. And I met your guy's dad once and he was a prick." I finished trying to think of anything else to add. "Also I hate most animals except for Crowley's dog."

"The hell hound?" Dean asked incredulously.

"That's the one." I responded "I'm sure there is more you think of anything feel free to ask." I closed my eyes again leaning back but quickly sat up again. "Where are we going?"

**Yeah thanks a lot you jackass.**

**what. Will you call me later. **

"We are going to Ohio we got a call in about some woman who claims her house drags people into the basement and eats them." Sam said. I stared at the text message. Ernest knew about Dean being my Dad he was the only one that I could really talk to about it.

"Cool." I said.

**I will cross my heart.**

"So we will do a few jobs with you until we figure out what to do with you." Dean said. I was a little irritated at being treated like I needed to be babysat but I let it go.

**Yeah you better. Promises promises.**

**I miss you. **

"Fabulous." I said taking off my seatbelt.

**Don't get soft on me now Kimmerling.**

**Miss you. **

I situated my bag and rested my head on it.

"Wake me up when we get their boys." I said as my phone vibrated.

**One of us has to be the woman in this not relationship. **

**Be careful. **

I smiled slipping the phone into my bag pocket and drifting off to sleep.


End file.
